Ask Laura: Send a nude on social media? How to help teens deal with this common request

Great question, and kudos to your daughter for standing up for herself.

Unfortunately, you are correct in that sexting or sending “nudes” has become a trend. Our team at The Social Institute surveyed more than 4,270 students across the U.S., ages 13 to 18. Of those polled, 47 percent know someone who has sent a nude photo. And 39 percent of students have received a nude photo that they did not ask for.

Yikes.

That’s worrisome for parents, and with good reason. Not only could a child under 18 receive felony charges for distributing “child pornography,” but they also lose control of what happens to their explicit photo. For example, when this 14-year-old shared a nude photo of herself, she woke up to find the photo shared around her entire school.

How do we equip students to navigate this world of sending or receiving explicit content?

Pause before you post: Wake middle school principal warns parents, kids after explicit photos found on social media

As a Social Media Coach, when I visit with schools across the country, I run gamified exercises with students called “Social Sprints." There are real-life social media scenarios, shared with us by teens nationwide, that students must quickly navigate in positive, high character ways -- all within 20 seconds!

Here’s an example to run with your child:

Your crush sends you a message on Snapchat asking for an inappropriate photo of you. They promise you they won’t screenshot it and that they’ll let it disappear. What do you do?

A: Reply and be direct about how you don’t send stuff like that

B: Send a funny meme shutting it down

C. Block the person

D. Find a new crush.

All answers are positive. Your move depends on your personality and experience. Which one would your child lock in on and why?

I encourage you to run these hypothetical situations with your child and challenge them to coach you on the “Do’s” of social media, not just the “Don’ts." As a teenager who grew up with technology, I remember my Dad running these hypothetical scenarios with me during the car rides to school in the morning or while hanging around the house.

These hypothetical exercises proactively empower students to understand how to handle common, difficult situations that they may face. They challenge us to think about what we would do, not just what we would not do.

Remember, there is always a positive, high character move we can make - during any type of social media situation!