The key to happiness is self-acceptance
Today’s world is so fast-paced. Social media trends are constantly changing the way we view ourselves. Advertisements vie for attention, telling you what you need now to be happy. Celebrities come and go, all glamorizing fame and success.
In a culture like this, it’s crucial for parents to guide young minds towards a path of genuine self-acceptance and happiness.
In my role as a life coach, I am focused on empowering youth to do this. Recently, I read a thought-provoking book, “Having the Courage to be Disliked: The Key to Happiness,” which gave me new insight on this.
Youth need to learn the principles behind real happiness.
Happiness occurs when we allow our mindsets to shift and our thinking to be free. It involves breaking free from self-imposed limitations, allowing yourself to change and embracing the courage to be disliked.
We live in a world that often pressures teens to conform to live a “fulfilled” life. Instead, teens need to embrace their true selves by reflecting on the past or preparing for the future.
Here are four keys to genuine happiness that parents can help teens:
1. Learn to embrace yourself
Happiness first starts with learning to embrace your authentic self.
You will know teens are doing this when they have the courage to be disliked. Oprah Winfrey once said that being disliked is a sign of exercising freedom and living according to your principles.
However, you can tell that teens are struggling to embrace themselves when they exhibit a strong desire for approval, low self-esteem, fear of judgment and difficulty speaking the truth.
To teach teens to embrace themselves, parents and teens should work together to:
Identify values – Teens better understand themselves when they learn what matters to them.
Develop self-confidence – Parents can help teens to believe in themselves and their abilities.
Manage emotions – When teens successfully navigate and express feelings, they can feel more secure in who they are.
2. Harness the power of positive self-talk
According to Psychology Today, self-talk can affect one’s behavior, beliefs, attitudes and overall well-being.
Words are powerful tools that can shape our thoughts and actions. Words have the power to encourage, persuade, soothe and bring healing. But they can also cause devastation and damage to ourselves and others.
With self-talk, you can conquer negative thoughts and promote positive ones. Use “alive” words to speak light and positivity into your situation. These words can help you adjust your perspective.
Consider telling yourself affirmations such as: "I am excited about the person I am becoming,” "I have the courage to overcome my challenges," and "My voice matters."
3. Cultivate positive relationships
According to a study from Harvard University, positive relationships are the number one factor contributing to happiness.
Parents can encourage teens to seek and maintain positive connections with friends, family, and mentors. Positive relationships can be found in extracurriculars, clubs, church, athletics, or in the classroom.
Positive relationships not only foster happiness but also contribute to overall well-being. Relationships are vital for finding contentment.
4. The role of personal development coaches
Young minds today are facing numerous challenges in culture and society. So, when guiding your teen to happiness, consider looking for outside assistance.
A personal development coach can provide transformative tools for teens. A personal development coach differs slightly from my job as a life coach — development coaches focus more on steps for self-improvement.
Personal development can help teens overcome challenges, provide personalized guidance, and assist in setting and reaching goals. Coaches can enable teens to reach goals by explaining to them how to think differently, set realistic objectives, and develop relevant strategies to reach them.
The coaching process also addresses mindset improvement and supports teens as they learn what continuous self-growth looks like.
Our world is unfortunately filled with external pressures that often manipulate our teen's self-perception. But parents and teens can work together to take steps to long-lasting happiness.
Remember, happiness starts with embracing your authentic self.
Parents, I encourage you to ask your teens these questions to reflect on these lessons:
- Are you comfortable and happy with yourself today?
- One must have the courage to be disliked. Do you?
- Do you have friends that support you? How do they impact your happiness?
- Describe a time when you felt inferior or less than — how did you overcome it?
