How to help students navigate drama in group chats
If you have a tween or teen with a smartphone, you know how active group chats have become. Almost 100% of Gen Z participate in group chats, with many participating in numerous group chats on a daily basis -- keeping their devices buzzing with notifications throughout the day (and night!).
Staying close to friends and family is important -- this need was made apparent during the social distancing phase of the pandemic and is reignited annually during the long holiday break from school. But oftentimes, quick communication between large groups of friends can lead to challenges -- such as a joke taken too far or a misinterpreted message.
How do group chats lead to drama?
Misunderstandings, arguments, and the overwhelming nature of group chats are some factors leading to drama. In fact, in The Social Institute’s recent LIVE lesson on group chat drama, nearly half of students surveyed reported they sometimes or often experience stress related to group chat drama.
One student recounted his experience to The Washington Post saying, “What happens in the group chat is what’s actually happening in the friendship. It’s really symbolic of the actual health of your friend group. I’ve noticed that as people start getting distant in real life, the group chat starts getting more and more empty.” It's clear that addressing group chat drama is essential for empowering students to maintain healthy relationships.
Not only are the messages in a group chat indicative of a friend group’s health, but they can also be a source of stress. More than half of the people who use group chats have left at one point from feeling overwhelmed. Balancing a sense of connection with family and friends and handling potential drama requires a positive approach. This year, empower your kids to manage group chat before they turn stressful by encouraging them to:
- Think Before You Type: Be mindful of what you say. Don't spam the chat with too many messages, and think about how your words might be taken.
- Remember Screenshots: Anything you say in the chat can be screenshotted. So, it's smart to keep things respectful and avoid sharing private stuff.
- Know What Causes Drama: Learn what usually makes drama in group chats – misinterpretations, too much talking at once, arguments, taking jokes too seriously, and leaving without saying why.
- Solve Problems Privately: If there's an issue, talk about it privately with the person involved instead of making it a big deal in the group chat.
- Include Everyone: Make sure everyone who should be in the chat is included. No one likes feeling left out.
- Use Emojis and GIFs: Add emojis or GIFs to lighten things up when it gets tense. It can make conversations more fun.
- Take Breaks: If things get too heated, take a break from the chat and come back when things have cooled down.
- Video or Phone Calls for Serious Stuff: If something's important or sensitive, it's better to talk through video or phone calls. It avoids misunderstandings that can happen in text
As a new year approaches, let’s empower students to leave negativity behind in 2023, starting with group message drama. By encouraging your kids to play to their core, handle the pressure, and cyberback one another, they can help create a positive environment with friends and family this year and beyond.
Laura Tierney is the Founder and CEO of The Social Institute, the leader in understanding student experiences and creator of #WinAtSocial, a gamified, online learning platform that equips students, educators, and families to navigate social experiences — online and offline — in positive, high-character ways. Follow Laura and her team’s work at @thesocialinst.
