Go Ask Dad: Turtle shells

My 8-year-old son’s friend came to visit with his mom. My wife and I welcomed her into the living room for what I assumed would be a sunny chat while the boys played upstairs. But a storm cloud crossed our visitor’s face when we innocently broached the topic of holiday trips with extended family.

Despite her protests, a news program had been left on the television. They said that the sound was off; the mother said it didn’t matter – it was the images. Sure enough, her child saw a bloodied boy pulled from the rubble of a building. Her son burst into tears! That night, he couldn’t sleep. He thought that the child had lived near them. He thought he was next.

Many parents and caregivers are familiar with helping a frightened child at bedtime. You crawl into bed with your child. You reassure your little one that you are here. Maybe you evoke the late Mister Rogers and say that, when tragedy strikes, look for the helpers. You probably carry your child to your bed, where, finally, your little one falls asleep.

Do you nod off? Or do you lie awake, remembering the images of the broken and bloodied bodies? Do you go to the window and look at the stars? What if it was your boy in the rubble? Your little love, who, it seems like just yesterday, had made you collapse into giggles when he sat upon the potty and pulled the lid on his back and exclaimed, “Look, I’m a turtle!” You realize that all of us have little protection.

You may or may not be a praying person, but you wish on the stars and whisper into your dark bedroom, hoping against hope that children everywhere might be safe. You wonder that if more adults across different religions, nations, and creeds might be moved to tears at the news of violence instead of going on with their lives like they were going into their shells, perhaps wars might happen less often. Maybe not at all.

Andrew Taylor-Troutman is the author of Little Big Moments, a collection of mini-essays about parenting, and Tigers, Mice & Strawberries: Poems. Both titles are available most anywhere books are sold online. Taylor-Troutman lives in Chapel Hill where he serves as pastor of Chapel in the Pines Presbyterian Church and occasionally stumbles upon the wondrous while in search of his next cup of coffee.