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Experts, advocates discuss domestic violence warning signs

Within about a month's time, two separate incidents involving teenagers have happened in central North Carolina.
Posted 2023-05-25T21:25:14+00:00 - Updated 2023-05-25T23:14:43+00:00
Experts talk about the increasing number of domestic violence cases among teenagers

Within about a month’s time, two separate incidents involving teenagers have happened in central North Carolina.

May 24, In Fayetteville, 18-year-old Tatiana Haywood died after sources say her boyfriend Nasir Scott shot her and then turned the gun on himself. On April 28, in Moore County, investigators say Avery Slatcher was stabbed by another student. Pinecrest students told WRAL say Slatcher had a relationship with the suspect.

“Not all relationships are healthy. There is a risk associated with dating,” said Ryan Kelly. “Often times, what is happening in a teen dating relationship may be played down or chalked up to youthful behavior.”

Kelly is the associate director of victim services for InterAct of Wake County. It’s a nonprofit that provides domestic violence and sexual assault services to survivors.

Women ages 16 to 24 experience domestic violence at the highest rate of any age group, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

“It is just as serious and just as dangerous as intimate partner violence amongst adults,” Kelly said.

Being new the dating world, Kelly said it’s important to recognizes patterns of behavior.

“Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner,” she explained.

That, Kelly clarified, is very different than when a partner gets angry once-in-a-while.

“If an offender has threatened the life of their dating partner, if they have used physical force against them, if they are stalking them…and if there is access to a firearm, these are all risk factors that can significantly increase the likelihood that that abusive partner is going to seriously injure or kill their partner. That is true for teens and adults,” she said.

Licensed clinical social worker Ty’Kia Brown said she has seen more teens coming in to discuss the issue.

“Teens look for purpose. They find purpose is many different ways. That purpose may be in another person,” she explained.

Brown mentioned the added pressures and unhealthy standards that have been set by social media.

“If I’m getting that standard off of something that is publicized…then that must mean it’s healthy, that it’s ok. It’s a social norm,” she said. However, that is not the case. She said the pandemic contributed to more codependency in relationships.

“We’ve got an impact of not being with anyone, that isolation, increase in anxiety and depression. ‘I don’t want to be alone. I can’t do without this person. They’re my everything.’”

Brown also provided advice for people who may know of, or be skeptical of, a domestic abuse situation.

“If they’re just not yet ready, continue to offer services but don’t allow too much pressure on them. At the end of the day, that’s a decision they’re going to have to make.”

If you or someone you know is in a domestic violence situation, you can call the national hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233).
InterAct also has a 24/7 hotline: 919.828.7740.

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