Dear Oxford: I'm rewriting the definition of a single mom

Dear Oxford Dictionary,

I have a bone to pick with you. According to your dictionary, a single mom is defined as:

”A person who takes care of their child or children without a husband, wife or partner.”

As a former single mom, on behalf of myself and all the single moms out there, I’d like to take it upon myself to completely re-write this definition.

Regardless of being single or not, being a mom is MUCH more than just being a “person." You have over 270,000 words in your little book, and you netted out on the word “person.” Really, Oxford?

My first suggestion is that you replace the word “person” with “superhero." Now that sounds more fitting! Forget Batman and Spiderman, single moms are the real deal, and they do it all without a sidekick!

Allow me to highlight just a handful of the countless ways in which she distinguishes herself from the rest of the pack:

The multitasking masters of the universe. She can seamlessly cook dinner, help with homework, fix the sink and braid hair. All while mentally making a shopping list and praying that she gets to catch 10 minutes of mindless TV before succumbing to exhaustion.

Fashionably challenged, but parentally superior. She may be sporting the same athleisure outfit for the hundredth time and neglect to shower, but rest assured that her kids are impeccably dressed and sparkly clean.

The ultimate shape-shifter. She has an innate ability to transform into whatever her little ones may require at any given moment - a human pillow, a sounding board, or a comforting shoulder to cry on. Without a second thought, she effortlessly changes to meet all their needs.

Masters of deception. She lets her kids think she has everything under control and knows all the answers, even when she’s secretly winging it. It's like watching a magician pull off an impressive trick - you have no idea how she did it, but you're just glad she did!

Now onto the next part… “...takes care of their child or children.”

Let's amp up this statement, which is currently as weak as a child's excuse for not doing their homework. We can do better than that!

A single mom not only takes care of her children but also pets, home, family, friends, teachers, coaches and neighbors. She has to hold it all together while remembering the smallest details. And if she has any energy left, maybe when her kids are finally grown up, she might have a chance to take care of herself.

Lastly, a single mom is defined as “without a husband, wife or partner.”

Let's get one thing straight - just because a mom isn't coupled up, doesn't mean she's doing it all by herself.

She may have a tribe of fellow friends, a pack of family members, or even a team of furry friends to help her out. And let's not forget about those ex-partners who are actually decent co-parents. They may not be the perfect partner, but at least they're good at sharing custody.

So here is my proposed definition - a little longer but a hell of a lot better:

A single mom is a superhero who performs one of the most challenging and fulfilling jobs on the planet. A powerhouse, she takes care of everyone and everything like a boss, no matter what it takes. Whether she has the help of her ex or not, she has the full support of her friends, family and the millions of other moms who have her back.

So, to all the single moms out there we are rewriting our story -- don't worry, you've got an army of supporters behind you, whether you like it or not!