Sixth-Grader’s Parents Say School Didn’t Do Enough to Stop Her Suicide

Parents of a New Jersey sixth-grader who killed herself last year after months of bullying sued school officials this week, stating that the school failed to take their repeated complaints seriously and instead sought ineffectual solutions like asking the 12-year-old to hug her bullies.

In the wrongful death lawsuit, the parents, Dianne and Seth Grossman, said the girl, Mallory, had repeatedly received negative texts and Snapchat messages from other students during her first year at Copeland Middle School in Rockaway Township. Some of the messages berated her by saying she had no friends, and others asked her when she would kill herself, the lawsuit says.

She was called “fat” and “jiggly” and was made fun of for her “frizzy” hair, according to the lawsuit filed in Morris County Superior Court, as part of “ongoing and systematic bullying of Mallory.”

Dianne Grossman, Mallory’s mother, said in an interview that she routinely contacted administrators about the bullying, but the school did not do enough in response.

At one point, the school asked Mallory and her bullies to “hug each other,” according to the lawsuit. When Mallory was bullied at lunch, the suit says, the school directed her to eat in a counselor’s office.

Hours before Mallory’s suicide on June 14, 2017, at a meeting about the bullying, her principal handed Mallory a poker chip and asked her to inscribe her initials and the date on it, and used a poker metaphor to address the situation, according to the lawsuit.

“Are you all in?” the principal asked Mallory, according to Grossman.

“There is this attack on the victim to ‘suck it up,'” Grossman said. “I knew they weren’t taking it seriously.”

The lawsuit names the school district’s board of education and a number of school officials, asserting that they were negligent in their responsibility to protect Mallory. The suit seeks damages and attorneys’ fees.

Bruce Nagel, lawyer for the Grossman family, said he had not received any response from school officials named in the lawsuit.

In a statement sent to news outlets in August, the Rockaway Township School District said the allegation that it “ignored the Grossman family and failed to address bullying in general, is categorically false.”

Greg McGann, the district’s outgoing superintendent, who is named in the lawsuit, did not respond to an emailed request for comment. A man who answered a phone number listed for McGann hung up after a reporter identified himself.

McGann took a leave of absence beginning in May. A new superintendent starts July 1.

Copeland Middle School officials and the Rockaway Township Board of Education did not respond to a request for comment. Alfonso Gonnella, the Copeland Middle School principal, did not respond either.

Michael Dachisen, the mayor of Rockaway Township, which is also named in the lawsuit, declined to comment specifically on the allegations in the lawsuit but said Mallory’s death “touched the whole community.”

“Hopefully some good will come out of this,” Dachisen said. Child suicide rates are on the rise, with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reporting last year that middle school students were as likely to die from suicide as from traffic accidents. A 2018 study found that suicide-related visits to the hospital from children had risen significantly.

The second season of the popular Netflix series “13 Reasons Why” focuses on a lawsuit against a school where the main character’s parents say the school did not do enough to stymie a bullying culture. The show has sparked national discussions over the portrayal of suicide in the media.

“The association between bullying and suicide is very nuanced, complicated,” said Melissa Holt, associate professor of counseling and psychology at Boston University. “It’s a combination of multiple factors that might lead to suicide.”

Perry Zirkel, a professor emeritus at Lehigh University who has studied lawsuits against schools after students’ suicide deaths, said the number of lawsuits was rising, though the suits are rarely decided in favor of the families.

“I do see an increasing number of liability cases,” Zirkel said, “in the wake of a tragic suicide, the family suing the school district, saying you could have done more and if you had done so my child would not have committed suicide.”

Grossman said she wanted to file the lawsuit to hold Copeland Middle School accountable. She said Mallory loved the outdoors, and the family often went camping. Mallory had competed in gymnastics since she was 4.

Mallory also liked making her own soaps and bracelets and would sell the bracelets to raise money for a local summer camp for children with cancer.

Grossman said she had no reason to believe Mallory was depressed or had any other medical issue that would have increased her risk of suicide, but Mallory would often tell her parents she was having bad days at school.

“She wanted help, but she didn’t want to draw attention,” Grossman said. “She didn’t want to be labeled a tattletale.”

Still, Grossman said she would routinely email the school about the problems and believed they were being addressed.

The day before the meeting with Mallory’s principal, Grossman said, Mallory had a breakdown.

“She couldn’t take it anymore,” Grossman said. “She had held it in for so long.”

Grossman said that after the meeting she planned to transfer Mallory to a private school. Hours later, her daughter had died.