Renee Chou: On a special birthday, the gathering is the true gift

When I was pregnant with Elsa, I remember some women’s reactions when I told them my due date was in May. “Oh, that’s a great birthday month!” they would say.

My thinking was, “Aren’t all months great when you’re talking about the birth of a child?”

But these moms explained to me the month can make a difference when it comes to hosting birthday parties. Summer months are challenging for turnout because of summer vacations. Winter months mean you probably won't ever have a party outdoors. And if your kid’s birthday is around a major holiday? Good luck having people around to celebrate!

I never thought about that until this year, marking the first time we would throw a birthday party for Elsa that included other kids. Her first three birthdays were family-only celebrations. Both sets of long-distance grandparents would fly into town to mark the occasion with us. Since she only gets to see her grandparents a few times a year, I didn’t want to take away that special time by inviting a host of others. And admittedly, I was fine without the stress of having to plan a party and entertain a bunch of little ones.

But for her 4th birthday - the big 4! -- Elsa wanted a birthday party. We’ve been to many of them already, and it was time. I knew it would be an outdoor party. Elsa loves parks.

One of her favorite places is Sassafras All Children’s Playground at Laurel Hills Park in Raleigh. We reserved the large picnic shelter there. My plan was simple: Serve lunch and cake, and let the kids play and burn off energy at the park! I didn’t have a Plan B if it rained. I was just hoping for a beautiful North Carolina spring day. Having a kid with a May birthday, I was willing to take that gamble.

We picked the first Saturday of May for her party. Invitations went out, and the RSVPs came in - 28 adults and 21 kids were coming to celebrate with us! Elsa was SO excited.

I asked her what she would like for her theme. She chose rainbows, because “they make me happy!” That made it easy. We ordered a cake decorated with a big rainbow, sun and clouds. I picked up multi-colored plates, napkins, cups and balloons. We ordered some catered food and bought drinks and snacks in bulk from Costco.

Elsa’s final party request -- a pinata! It was something she enjoyed at another friend’s birthday party. So we went pinata shopping. Of all the cartoon character pinatas we saw in the store, the one she picked was none other than -- Disney's Queen Elsa! Of course!

As the day of her party approached, we kept a careful watch on the forecast. Early in the week, it looked like Saturday was going to be a washout. I was worried, but told myself not to get too stressed about something I couldn't control.

With each passing day, the rain chances diminished and shifted to the evening hours which would be well after her party. I decided no matter what happened, we could still have a nice party under the picnic shelter. Then I reminded myself that Elsa wasn't concerned about the weather. She would have fun, rain or shine, because it was HER day to celebrate with friends.

May 5th arrived. Elsa picked out the dress, hair bow and sandals she wanted to wear. We got to the park early to set up. The weather was stellar! Wall-to-wall sunshine, low humidity, and a high of around 80 degrees. It could not have been more beautiful!

Elsa and her friends played all around the park and then gathered for lunch. They went to play again, and came back for cake and the pinata. I realize it may have been a little risky to have 4 to 8-year-olds swinging hard with a big stick, but I'm happy to report all stayed safe and reaped the rewards of a big candy haul.

I looked over at my birthday girl. She was beaming! She held her friends' hands, gave them hugs, and enjoyed it all. Elsa told me her favorite moment was when everybody sang "Happy Birthday" to her. When the party was over and the guests departed, she looked sad. "What's wrong, sweetie?" I asked. She replied, "I want my friends to come back!"

In another year, her tastes will change. There will be a new theme; perhaps new friends. What won’t change is knowing how special and fun it is to gather people to celebrate a very important person. No matter the venue, the gathering is the true gift. And to be able to host that celebration in the month of May? I consider it icing on the cake.