banner
Go Ask Mom

Go Ask Mom

Lynda Loveland: Queen motormouth of random thoughtville

Posted March 28, 2012 8:49 p.m. EDT

Lynda Loveland

You probably have one at home. The child who can talk endlessly about anything and everything.

I have one. Her name is Campbell and she's eight years old. She can keep a one-sided conversation going longer than it takes to circle the earth, walking, four times, heel to toe.

The other night, on her night to sleep with me, I decided to keep track of what she talked about. All three kids are very different in what they like to do on "our" night. Carys, five, likes to snuggle face to face for a while, then go to sleep. Caiden, six, wants me to scratch his back. Campbell just wants to talk.

So there we are, in my king size bed with Cam lying skin to skin next to me. We only occupied about a quarter of the bed. Can you say "comfy?" The light goes off and off she goes.

She warms up her vocal chords by talking about the bronze otter that teachers at her school get awarded. Several of her teachers have gotten it. It's really an honor. It must weigh about eight pounds. (By the way, I'll just give you the Cliff Notes version of her monologue. I usually throw in an uh-huh or two, but that's it.)

She segues into, "Wouldn't it be cool if I dug up a 263 pound gold nugget in the back yard?"

"What if we had dinosaur bones in the back yard? I could dig them up and put them together?"

"What if I found a brand new, undiscovered dinosaur in our back yard? If I had books of similar dinosaurs, I could put it together and they could name it after us!"

"Mom, do you remember when I found a little kitten next door? It was under the rose bush and its eyes were closed."

"Can you believe guinea pigs can have five or six babies?"

"Mom, can you believe I didn't get wet during the Shamu show at Sea World?"

"Mom, you know that book I have about weird things? It talks about why feet stink. It's the bacteria you know. And why yawning seems contagious."

At that point she'd covered eight topics in the span of less than five minutes! I honestly don't think she took a breath the whole time! I just gave you the bullet points and left out the elaborations!!

It's like she has this big, spinning wheel in her head and she talks about whatever topic it lands on! I finally told her it was time to shut off her brain and go to sleep. I was exhausted!!!

Do you have a talker?

Lynda is the mom of three and co-host of Mix 101.5 WRAL-FM's Bill and Lynda in the Morning. Click here to follow her on Facebook. Find her here on Thursdays.