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How Not to Get Eaten By an Alligator

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I was cruising the Orlando Sentinel looking for stories about Orlando fence contractors or Orlando fences or, like, a neighbor dispute that would prove that "good fences make good neighbors". Instead, because I am an expert Web surfer, I found instructions for alligator safety. This might be the best article I have read all week. What I love about the article is how local it is. I mean, you have to live in Florida (or somewhere else in Alligator country) to even need such instructions. What comes across as kitschy in New York City, is probably actually serious stuff in Orlando.

How does one avoid getting eaten by an alligator? Well, the articles suggests things like: Don't swim in alligator-infested areas; Deon't feed alligators; Don't try to take an alligator as a pet; If you see one, run away in a straight line for at least 30 feet; If an alligator bites you, hit it on the nose repeatedly and scream. Good to know the next time you're fishing in an alligator-filled lake.