Burger review: Burger Bach

Michael: Crikey! Look at these burgers.

Don: Um, I’m pretty sure that’s…

Chad: They’re certainly very proud of their condiments. There’s a whole section of the menu devoted to their aioli, free range mayo, organic house-made ketchup, blueberry chipotle BBQ sauce. I stuck with the Basic, the plainest hamburger they make, with ketchup, mustard and pickle (no onions please), and it was so slathered with condiments they started oozing off the burger as soon as I picked it up. They practically squirted out the sides of the bun when I took a bite. It was like they had been applied with a trowel.

It was too much to handle I needed to cut this burger. You call that a knife? This is a knife..

Don: Chad, that’s Crocodile Dundee. He’s Aus…

Carolyn: I got the Aucklander – very good patty cooked medium, with an slightly exorbitant amount of greens on top. The NZ cheese was super tasty although sometimes got lost in the greens. The rest of the toppings got lost amongst the burger and the greens as well, although the combination thereof was delightful. The fries were VERY good, too, although the dipping sauces tended towards being over-garlicked. One large order of fries was more than enough for 4 people.

Throw another shrimp in the barby, guvnah?

Don: Guvnah? That’s wrong on two counts. Plus, yours didn’t have shrimp on it.

Michael: I had the East Coast. The blueberry chipotle BBQ sauce, Brie, and bacon? Great combination with the wonderfully beefy patty. Though the bun was dry, what it contained kept this burger in four territory.

I don’t quite get the name, though. Burger Bach (Bok)? What is that? Dun dun dun…dun.

Don: First of all, it’s Burger Bach (Batch). Second, that’s Beethoven. You’re just making bad Australian jokes. This place is New Zealand themed. The Original was great except there was a conflict between the free range mayonnaise and the Bach sauce to see who could almost over power the burger. It was very close to ruining the feel good vibe that the Bach had going for it. I was quite surprised that the Kiwis were able to put together such a good burger. Now I can be jealous about more than their rugby team.

Chad: New Zealand, huh? This burger is my precious.

Don: Wait, what?

Carolyn: One doesn’t simply walk into Burger Bach.

Don: Look. Lord of the Rings was just filmed in New Zealand. It didn’t take place there. I’ve had enough of this. Let’s just get to the ratings. I give it a 4.25.