Broader perspectives: Local mom-daughter group connects to serve others

Here in the Triangle, there are several chapters, and some are partnering to host a food and supply drive for those in need on Oct. 18 at Martin Middle School in Raleigh.

I checked in with Alisa Smith, president of the Longleaf Pine chapter, to learn more about the group and the food and supply drive. Smith, who moved to North Carolina to pursue a doctorate in industrial organizational psychology at N.C. State University and now focuses her time on volunteering, is raising four children, who are in sixth to 11th grade, with her husband in Raleigh.

"My world, as a young person, did not readily overlap with the grave realities of our world and I was at a loss to know how to help others or know where to connect," said Smith, who is involved in the league with her two daughters. "My desire and that of many of my fellow NCL, Inc. members is for our children to have a broader perspective and see their lives past their individual needs. I cannot say our impact is huge in comparison to many, but I am thankful for each opportunity we get to touch the lives of those around us. Ultimately, we have discovered those we have met, touch our lives in a significant and powerful way."

Here's a Q&A.

Being a twin to a brother, I had insight into the profound differences between female and male opportunities. I recall my mother going to bat with school administration during my elementary years to level the playing field and designate more lead female roles in school plays and again, in high school, when I declined to take home economics, mandatory at my all-girls high school, for chemistry.

I quickly saw the value of NCL, Inc. and its pursuit of leadership development in girls. Recently, we invited Claire Shipman, best-selling author of "The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance—What Women Should Know and the Confidence Code for Girls" to speak at our kickoff in August 2020. We learned what we instinctively know, girls are consumed with doubt on the inside and are less likely to take risks for fear of failure, disproportionally to boys. As a mother of daughters, I want to chip away at the doubts that plague women of all ages and provide experiences and opportunities for success with service opportunities, tackling leadership roles and learning cultural norms that positively rewrite the messages girls and women self-speak.

In addition, Ticktockers as they are called, develop friendships that cut across school boundaries, social cliques and beyond who they might naturally choose. As they grow up together, they learn how to navigate broader social dynamics, step up to subsume leadership within their Ticktocker class like President, Parliamentarian, VP Communication etc., see with their own eyes the needs of the community, serve with one another and learn how to try their own hand at making things better. This program forces them to roll up their sleeves and get involved.

We have served at HUMC Victory Garden side-by-side with English as Second Language students, immigrants and other community volunteers to participate in sustainable urban gardening. These vested volunteers share in the harvest and the rest is donated to Plant a Row for the Hungry and to the Interfaith Food Shuttle. At Hope Reins, we get ‘physical’ and clean up their ranch property, serve kids in crisis during their fall festival and decorate the ranch to make it inviting and special for these children. Through their program, each child is paired with a rescued horse to find hope and healing.

Through all these experiences, I have been given not only the gift of time with my daughters, but have been afforded the opportunity to develop a partnership with them as we complete the six-year NCL, Inc. experience. We have served side by side and participated in meetings together such as the Philanthropy Fair, annual Mother-Daughter Tea and Ticktocker Tribute. We have had a chance to learn from each other and see seeds of compassion grown within each of us.

Through these experiences, I have learned about my daughters ’ passions, fears and dreams. They have watched me take on leadership roles past my own comfort zone, step up and say ‘Yes, I can do that’ even when personally doubtful, seen me fail and learn that it is OK. We are developing confidence, social awareness and a mutual respect. We are genuinely inspired by members’ dedication and accomplishments, moms who juggle professional careers and daughters who excel in school and athletics but still find time to serve in our community.

We have reformulated our face-to-face opportunities and are now making bagged meals for Oak City Cares instead of directly serving on their campus, sending virtual greetings and videos of encouragement (poetry readings, dance and musical numbers etc.) to the elderly population at the Cardinal and have added some at-home philanthropy partners like Operation Gratitude and the Kindness Campaign where we are now making paracord bracelets for the military and headbands for children in schools. These are just a few of the adjustments that our Philanthropy and Patroness Activities committees have made.

We also are partnering with the Sea Turtles Chapter in Wilmington and the Outer Banks Chapter to collect supplies for the Food Bank of Central and Eastern NC, Interfaith Food Shuttle, Hope Mission, Oak City Cares, Raleigh Rescue Mission and Nourish NC. These partners need community support as we help them ‘stock’ their supply shelves as they serve the most vulnerable populations during COVID-19.

This year, due to the pandemic, we are hosting a drive-thru event. We are encouraging all Ticktockers, with the help of their Patronesses, to expand collection efforts and spread the word about the great work we do with NCL, Inc. One suggestion is to have members hang a paper grocery bag on neighbors’ front door with a note introducing oneself and NCL, Inc. and asking for the neighbor to leave the bag with any donated items on their front porch for pick up (similar to the annual drive done by the US Postal Service).

We appreciate ANY community member or local business that would like to stop by our event and drop off supplies. Longleaf Pine members, Amy Merriman (amytmerriman@gmail.com ) and Sandi Carrier (dscarrier28@gmail.com) are leading the event and can be reached for any questions. We are collecting men’s white socks, cooling towels, bottled water, cloth masks, paper napkins, brown paper lunch bags, men’s XL/XLL T-shirts, individually wrapped wipe packets, serving gloves (latex and powder-Free), plastic flatware disinfecting wipes, disinfecting spray among canned food products.