Ask Laura: What to do when your house has strict tech rules, but your kids' friends don't

I speak with parents around the country, and this is a frequent concern I hear – so rest assured knowing you’re not alone. I recommend a two-prong approach – focused on the other parents and your own kids.

Let’s start with the other parents. It might feel awkward at first, but just like you would talk to them about food allergies, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask about family tech rules. Reach out ahead of time and share your family’s standards. “Josh loves hanging out at your house, thanks for having him again. Since they’ve been spending so much time together, I wanted to check in on your family’s tech rules. In our house we ask that Josh power down screens by 10 p.m. on weekends, and we have parental controls set on his device.”

If the other parent says they do not have standards or tech limits in place, we suggest talking through some of these questions:

Next – take the opportunity to huddle with your child about your family’s standards, and how those values are important to follow no matter the pressure they may face. Reiterate the reasons why you don’t want them online late at night or playing certain video games. Remind them about ways they can navigate tricky social situations without going against family values.

When it comes down to it – all parents have a shared goal of raising healthy kids. Chances are the other parents will be happy you opened the door to this important conversation.

Our team at The Social Institute believes that huddling with kids is always a winning move. So go ahead and initiate those sometimes difficult conversations -- we suspect you’ll be glad you did.