Full interview: Surviving 9/11

Paul McHale reflects on Sept. 11, 2001, and how his life has changed since that day.
Posted 9/8/2011, 11:59:00 PM Updated 8/23/2021, 2:40:07 AM

You know we want to reflect back on 10 years

ago you were saying does it feel like it's been

now Sometimes Does sometimes it feels longer sometimes like I

said I can't believe it ever happened at all

Yeah I mean you do you question wow

Yeah

So I guess it all depends

Do you do you still think about it every day

Not every day at least once a week I would

say a couple of times a week

And what do you think about Do you picture yourself

back there or you just I don't really think about

it

I see things that remind me of it if even

a plane I look up if I hear a loud

plane going by or an engine fire engine going by

that automatically triggers it right away you know So I

don't really give it too much thought at all but

brings it back really instantly

Mhm

You picture yourself back there

So tell us where you were

I was on the 39th floor of one World Trade

Center is that the north tower that's the north town

And I was just doing my normal normal things

And uh I was walking out of my office I

was going to break room for to get I'm not

sure coffee or whatever and I just heard a plane

and the thought process was like a second and that's

close and it hit the building and as I was

walking the building just swayed and I took a few

steps forward and I thought this is going to snap

I thought the building was just going to go over

and then it just came back again

And uh that was that the whole thing just swayed

stayed there and came back and that whole process took

five seconds from hearing the plane the impact it's waiting

to come back that's how fast everything started

What did you think happened I heard the plane so

I knew plane struck the building and I went to

my window which faces north which is where the plane

came from

And the building across the street from me had a

glass front so I could look at my window and

I saw the reflection of the silhouette of where the

plane went into the building

And I just saw that so many papers floating down

to the streets

I knew right away it was a plan

And what did you think to do just that Just

I called my wife to let him know I think

a plan I knew a plane hit the building

I was 99.9% sure but just said yeah quite sure

plane hit the building we're going to start to leave

And the other lady came into my office and she

didn't hear the plane she said what was that And

uh I told her I think a plane to sit

out building and we walked down to the hallway and

everyone was there were different offices different companies on the

same floor and they just came running out pushing each

other running nothing like the fire drills you go through

when you worked there everyone lined up orderly

That didn't happen

And uh we went back in I said let's get

out things together and we'll leave we'll just walk down

together

And she went back in she changed her shoes I

grabbed a few of my belongings locked the door they'd

show that was locked

And uh we went into the stairwell and that was

already full with people walking down and we just got

in line and started walking down and we made it

to about the The 28th floor

And that's when we saw the firefight they started to

come up and that's when everything kind of slowed a

bit because they were carrying all their equipment upstairs what

were they carrying They had extra oxygen tanks crowbars stretches

things like that

So they're trying to come up and we're going down

and how are you I mean there were it was

a narrow staircase and there were people on one side

people on the other and they were firefighters coming up

between us

Then every now and then you would see someone who

was injured from the upper floors come down uh severely

burnt and in pretty bad condition that someone was helping

them come down

So we just wait for them to pass You would

let them pass

Of course you had to and so my gosh how

terrible was it to see It was shocking

There was people who were severely burnt that were crying

with it looked like it was there close we're hanging

it was actually their skin that was hanging off

And so they came down and of course everyone let

them go first

But at this point I mean are you like oh

my gosh this is real

And I yeah I mean I still was no one

was really panicking

Everyone just thought they were going to walk down and

everything is going to be fine and then you know

things are to happen in the second plane hit the

building next to us and we all felt that the

concussion but no one guy next to me looked at

me he said what was that I had no idea

no one had any communication about what was going on

outside and uh we had no windows it's just a

stale

Well so we just kept walking down

And as we got down closer to about the 20th

floor the firefighters asked us to come out they found

another stairwell on the other side of the floor which

was not being used

He said let's get all the civilians into that so

they can exit faster

So that helped a bit and doing that as I'm

walking across the floor to the other end they had

all the firefighters that were just lined up against the

wall relaxing taking a break taking over for the year

and they were joking with each other once you get

back to the firehouse they're gonna get on that treadmill

I didn't know I was in this bad of shape

I guess they were the older guys had just climbed

up 20 flights of staffs in full gear and they

would go they were getting on each other you know

you're on board your worst shirt shape than I am

and it that's what they were and they had no

idea at all what kind of danger they were in

A lot of those guys probably never they never made

it out and they were all together and I think

part of the reason they never found a lot of

the firefighters remains were these guys had taken off all

their jackets too take a break and there was at

least a dozen of them right there and they were

just going back and forth and get your father talking

about you know they're gonna start jogging they're gonna start

working out more mm I don't know if they ever

made it out do you think about that Yeah I

sure do

And I wish I knew who they were their names

who want not but they were all together having a

having a I'm not a good time but they were

relaxed with each other together like they do

Yeah no idea

No idea at all

Yeah

Yeah

And so we made it to the other staircase and

that was going we're moving faster than and then the

this uh south tower collapsed

And when that went down it was just like an

earthquake

The whole building was shaking

Uh they had this huge cloud of smoke just came

up from downstairs

And when someone yelled out the floors below us are

collapsing

And that's when the people some ladies behind me started

to scream go up go up

And they ran back upstairs and I know that was

not the right decision to make

And second later all the lights when I was completely

black and that lasted for about two seconds

And the firefighters that were with us they had flashlights

on their helmets

They just came on

They just click those and those are the only lights

we had just to follow them through the buildings

And where were you when that happened That was the

10th floor

That was the 10th floor

Yeah

So you still had 10 floors to go

10 flights

You don't know what's going on below you know No

idea what means

You think I gotta keep getting out of here at

that point

Um I don't know why I took over

I just said I'm not going back up

I'm going back down

I'm heading down and I don't know what it was

Something guided me saved your life decision

Mm hmm

So you finally get down to the lobby area or

we made it through just following the firefighters and one

of them up ahead said okay we're here we're at

the lobby

And I was thinking all right the lobby in the

World Trade Center was all marble and chandeliers and always

spotless

And I walked out there and I assume that would

be ambulances outside helping people

And it was devastated

I was devastated to see what had happened chandeliers were

falling down the marble slabs on the wall

So coming off and so we had an inch our

way along the side of the wall and someone had

uh one of the firefighters had smashed a hole in

the glass forced to walk out

And so and just as we're doing that you could

tell the whole building I didn't even realize that then

the whole building was collapsing with everything that was falling

off the walls

And so I walked outside and there was just debris

I don't know if it was from the plains that

crashed or the other tower that fell and there was

no one around

And where is everyone And I looked over to where

the south tower was where it used to be

And it was just a big cloud of smoke that

you saw right And when it collapsed and I just

assumed the south tower was right behind that smoke said

okay

And they were Mhm

A lot of I don't know if there's people that

have jumped on the people that were in the plains

just torsos and what not that I can't even think

about and uh I started walking to where I knew

there were a flight of stairs I was in the

plaza outside and there was a flight of stairs with

an elevator that went down to the street and I

knew to go there and some firefighter came running by

and just run and run and he just kept running

So running from what I looked up in the tower

was still in flames and we we walk me and

the lady I was with and a few other people

that have followed us out and we made it to

west broadway and I started going up broadway and Grace

the lady I was with said we made it and

we'll see you tomorrow

And so she turned up I think it was Chambers

Street I'm not sure now

And I started walking north and it was only about

a block north of the trade center and I saw

a lady walking towards me and she was looking up

over my shoulder and she just screamed all there it

goes

I said that goes what And I turned around and

building was just going down and so I just took

off running

How long had you been out of the building It's

less than five minutes

Oh my God

So I thought uh more buildings are going to collapse

I knew all the gas pipes that were on the

streets I thought these are going to blow up

And so I just made my way up town to

penn station which is how I took my click the

train home

So when did you talk to your wife again I

guess it was about noon

We had cell phones but nothing was working

All the antennas were on the trade center and they

still had pay phones back then believe it or not

and most of those were not working

There were a few here and there that had a

line of people waiting uh to get in line to

call someone

And finally I was up about 5th was on 5th

Avenue and 25th Street I walked up to and there

was one lady on the phone and I saw it

was working she was speaking to someone

So I stood behind her and that's when I finally

called and I guess I'm not sure exactly when it

was about noon and that was the first time she

knew she watched the whole thing on tv with my

Children

And so yeah what did she say Where are you

let me come and get you

I said hey I don't think you can come and

get me right now

And so I said and I'll see you soon

And I looked up and there was I was on

25th and 5th I looked up and there was the

empire state building right that might be next

So uh I didn't know this by now

We had f 16 f sixteen's crisscrossing Manhattan which I've

never seen before

And I was like I think something else is going

to happen

So I made my way uh to the east side

of Manhattan and I woke up to Penn station and

that was shut down and people are just milling around

trying to get on a train home and that took

a few hours

I don't think I got home about two o'clock maybe

about three in the afternoon that day I finally got

on the train but you were still anxious at this

point we want to believe I didn't know what was

if I was going to get home that day if

I was going to be stuck in Manhattan overnight because

then there were rumors on the street that there were

bombs and the subways and bombs in Penn station and

the cotton the police are going through there making sure

there was no suspicious packages or anything

And I finally got on the train It was packed

it was standing room only and going through the tunnel

there was not a sound people aren't speaking all everyone

was very nervous because now you're in a pitch black

tunnel

And as soon as we came out of the tunnel

everyone just started clapping because the daylight hit the car

And you could see outside again and that lasted for

about 10 seconds and then we look to the side

and you could see the trade center burning you could

just see the smoke out in the distance and then

it was back to a boy reality Yeah

But yeah

Uh huh

I mean do you think about how lucky you were

I mean that you weren't higher up on the floor

that you thought to go down that you're very lucky

Think about it

I can't tell you how much and how often you

think about and your family I mean were you thinking

about them Of course that was the whole everything that

was on my mind and I think my girls they

didn't know exactly what was going on but my my

two sons were in high school and my son kevin

he was walking by the principal's office which to this

day I still have to ask him why were you

in the principal's office again And and he had the

tv on and they saw what had happened and he

ran down to the gym were my oldest son was

and uh he said dad's building just got hit by

a plane that's on fire and they were only blocks

from my house we lived in a marathon in Long

island and they both came running home and they watched

it on tv with my wife a lot of their

friends in the years before that I had taken my

sons and their friends to see the new york Yankees

parade in Lower Manhattan when they won the world series

So of course all their friends knew I worked there

and what not

So they were all calling up and coming over

It was concerned

Oh everybody was wondering if you were right

Huh

Mhm

So this changed your life forever

I mean you lost your job then you change careers

I mean this yep

Yeah I changed everything familiar that day

Do you feel I mean it's changed your life in

a good way though

I mean you found him you've come to north Carolina

your family's here now

You ever wonder if that didn't happen I sure do

I don't know what would have happened Sleep You know

the opportunity opened up for me to start a new

career and start a new life in the a place

where I billy chose to live

I mean I lived in new york because I was

born there and we looked around for a nice place

to relocate to

It just worked out this way

Do you have anger still do you I don't know

Do you have hatred for people or you know I

mean not at all no

Maybe for the individuals themselves that uh you know I

don't understand what they thought they were accomplishing killing innocent

civilians But other than you know I wouldn't say it's

hatred

There's no room for hatred

Does this anniversary mean anything to you Will it be

just another day How have the other anniversaries coming You

know you talked about the first anniversary you still were

you know panic you know Well I certainly think about

it but for the past three years I've been doing

something

We've uh my Children and I we run in the

uh steven still a five K run and wake far

steven still it was a new york city firefighter who

died on september 11th and there's a five K run

each year in Wake Forest that we take part in

And it goes the money goes to a benefit foundation

for Stephen still help certain different organizations out

Um and we do that each year

Yeah daughters Yes yeah and my son

And so a lot of the money goes to different

funds

One of the funds it goes to is uh it

helps fund scholarships for Children who have lost a parent

serving in the armed forces in the Iraq and Afghan

War I think that's great

And steven still who um died on September 11 he

was not working that day he was off he got

his gear out of his car in Brooklyn and ran

through the battery tunnel into Manhattan and was last seen

going into the World Trade Center And he lost both

his parents by the time he was 10 years old

And so that's why this foundation is uh it's for

them it's for Children who have lost a parent So

it gets you more involved in September 11 not just

sitting home thinking about it going out and doing something

and helping people

Yeah something good can get out of it you know

do something positive

Do you feel like you'll ever have closure I know

people hate that word

Yeah I'm not sure

I'll know I'm never gonna forget it I'll tell you

that and I'll never stop thinking about it closure

I mean I have no hater anger in my heart

but I don't think you want closure because you want

to think about all the people that lost their lives

You know you don't want to forget about them so

you don't want to forget about that

There must be weird though to think that you saw

faces of people those firefighters I wish I had their

names that I could tell

You know the relatives there were so many people had

stopped to help other people

Uh One gentleman was uh in a chair he was

having trouble breathing he had his he must have been

in his uh sixties and he was sitting down in

just an office chair that someone had found

And the lady uh coworker was standing next to him

and the firefighter had given him an oxygen mask to

breathe through and someone said so you know come with

us the other firefighters can take care of him

And she said no I know him I want to

stay with

And that was right before we left the building

Like she stayed to help that gentleman

And I don't think she ever made it out

And there were so many other people that I you

know that I left that I could have gotten up

and left

But they stayed to help others

And you wish you could tell their families exactly

They're dying moments

And there were gentlemen younger guys who are helping firefighters

carry some equipment up the stairs

I wish I knew their names so I could tell

them

You know they were there helping out the firefighters so

well it's good you're telling us maybe you know people

will you know people through the years have heard those

types of stories and maybe thought okay maybe that was

my husband that did that

And that's why you got kelly was helping

Exactly

That would make you feel better about it