To the women who destroy other women

Posted April 13

Why do we seek to bring down other women, knowing how hard life can be for a woman? Rudeness is a weak person's imitation of self-respect and strength. We have been socialized and taught to compete with one another, and this cycle needs to end!

I believe that jealousy and envy play major roles in tearing each other down. These feelings can come from seeing women who are confident in their bodies, their relationships with men, their career and their lives.

These feelings are also caused by a perceived inequality in such things as homemaking skills, mothering aptitude, creative talent and time-juggling abilities. But we each have strengths and weaknesses. And most often, people are not as good at things as they may seem. Everyone looks better on Instagram, Pinterest and Facebook, and at church on Sundays. (I know I like to make my life look like a lot of fun, when in reality it's pretty boring.)

I have a few things to say to the women who tear down other women, beginning with a favorite quote of mine by Eleanor Roosevelt:

1. "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people."

2. Putting other women down is showing the world that you are more concerned with hurting others than you are about your own progress.

3. Ignoring what's going on in the world isn't helping anyone. We must not just sit quietly on the sidelines. Being neutral helps the bullies, not the victim.

4. A woman who knows her worth doesn't measure herself against other women, but stands strong, calm and self-confident.

5. Empowered women empower women. When women support each other, incredible things happen!

6. A negative outlook will never lead to a positive life.

7. Nobody has ever made themselves greater by showing how small someone else is. Be someone who makes everybody feel like a somebody!

8. Class is knowing WHAT to say, WHEN to say it, and WHEN to stop.

9. "You may be pretty and you may be talented, but nobody will remember that if you're mean." -- Katie Holmes

10. "Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." -- Dali Lama

11. "Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." -- Mother Theresa

12. Other women are not your competition. Stand with them, not against them!

Every woman is more than what you see. Let's look for the good in all and stand together, not against one another.

Erin Adair lives in the Rocky Mountains with her husband & tiny dog Violet. She has an alarming obsession with books and is often seen with her hands stained by ink or splashed with paint. Visit her Instagram @TwelveYorkiePaws


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