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The 6 best kept secrets to finding true love

Posted December 27, 2016

For many, finding true love is like searching for a needle in a haystack. You search for so long that you begin to wonder if true love actually exists. Well, I'm here to tell you that love doesn’t have to be a figment of your imagination - you can find it if you’re willing to work for it.

True love is made up entirely by your perception love and how much you are willing to put into a relationship. While seeking out true love may feel like uncovering a secret, the fact is, you’ve been in on the secret this whole time and you didn’t realize it.

Here are six of the best kept secrets to finding true love:

1. Have an open mind

Don’t close your mind off from the possibility of true love. Have an open mind in your relationships. You’ll be able to see things from an entirely new perspective if you allow your mind to expand toward new possibilities. If your mind is shut off to the thought of true love, you’ll never be able to find it. Never judge a book by its cover, and certainly never judge someone by their first impression.

2. Don’t hold on to the past

If you’ve got one foot in the future but your eyes are on the past, you’re only going to tear yourself apart. You’ll certainly never be able to move on to greater things. It's difficult to let go of the past in any circumstance. The future is intimidating because it’s like walking blindly through fog in the middle of the night, you have no idea where you’re going, but that’s the beauty of having faith in yourself, you ride the waves as they come.

Be strong. If you’re still holding onto the past, it’s time to let go and take that step into the future.

3. Treat others the way you want to be treated

Have respect for all you come in contact with, especially those you date. It’s a good word of thumb to follow the mantra: treat others the way you want to be treated. If you want to be treated kindly and with respect (especially on dates), treat others how you want to be treated. Those kind actions and feelings will only be reciprocated.

4. Love yourself for who you are

This is something often repeated in life, but it’s one of the most important things to remember. Modern society expects a certain standard from both men and women. Such standards are nearly impossible for every one of us on earth to amount to. It’s easy to get discouraged when you think you "fail" to meet the world's standards.

Just because the scale doesn't show a certain number when you step on it doesn’t mean you aren’t a healthy person. And it most certainly doesn’t mean you’re not a good person. You should come to love yourself just the way you are. Only then can you start making important changes in your life that will help you better yourself. Don’t let anyone else tell you who you are or who you should be - especially in a relationship. It’s certainly true love when you are able to love each other for exactly who you are.

5. Have a positive outlook on the future

Don't be afraid of the future. You’ll never be able to do anything worthwhile in life, especially fall in love, if you don’t have a positive outlook on things to come. Life may seem confusing and difficult if things are not going your way, but I promise you if you take a step back and list all of the good things you have in your life, you will be overwhelmed with gratitude and optimism. Positivity will make your light shine and people will take notice. Perhaps, even your true love will notice.

6. Don’t be afraid to let go

In The Fault in Our Stars by John Green, Hazel, the main character, says, “I fell in love the way you fall asleep, slowly and then all at once.” Falling in love is intimidating. But you never know when it will happen to you. First it starts out slow, and then you find yourself caring more about a person than you ever thought you were capable of. Don’t be afraid to let go and fall in love all at once. Love is a whirlwind that will take you on a magical journey, and you will learn to see every circumstance in your life in a new light.

Finding true love is never easy, but with a little bit of patience and the willingness to let go, you’ll find it when you’re ready.

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