HILLSBOROUGH, N.C. — In a chilling videotaped confession, a 19-year-old man charged in both his father's slaying and a school shooting said violence shaped his life and could end it.

Alvaro Rafael Castillo, of Hillsborough, is believed to have sent the tape and a letter to The Chapel Hill News minutes before a Wednesday afternoon shooting outside Orange High School. Two students suffered minor injuries in the shooting.

Castillo, who is being held without bond in Central Prison, faces 10 charges in connection with the school shooting. He also is charged with first-degree murder in connection with the fatal shooting of his father, Rafael Huezo Castillo, a Durham school custodian whose body was found Wednesday afternoon in his home in northern Orange County.

"Look at me. I'm not even crying. I just killed him, and I feel fine," Alvaro Castillo said in the video, showing off a sheet he said covered his father's corpse.

Orange County authorities are reviewing the tape as part of their investigation into the two crimes.

"Don't judge me for what I did. Based on what I did, you might think I'm a monster, a sick freak. ... But I tried to do good things. I tried," Castillo said in the video. "I'm sorry for the pain I'm going to cause, but I'm not right in the head. I just want to die. I might get jailed. I might get tortured. I don't know what's going to happen."

He talks how violence shaped his life, citing a preference for movies like "Predator" and "Natural Born Killers." He becomes very animated and agitated when talking about alleged abuse at the hands of his father.

"I treated everybody with respect as best I could. All I wanted was respect in return," he said.

A neighbor and a supervisor of Rafael Castillo described him as friendly, kind and very talkative. Both said they were surprised by the abuse allegations.

Alvaro Castillo also sent an e-mail to the principal of Columbine High School in Colorado, the site of the deadliest school shooting in U.S. history, early Wednesday to announce his intention to commit a similar act in North Carolina.

Colorado authorities notified Orange County investigators about the threat, but the shooting outside Orange High already had occurred.