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Lynda Loveland: Tween connectivity

Posted July 17, 2013

Lynda Loveland

My oldest daughter officially entered into tweendom. She just turned 10 and, I swear, all of a sudden, she seems a little more mature.

Emphasis on the little, but still, more mature. What is it about double digits that makes them seem older? I haven’t left her home alone yet, but I think I could for short periods of time.

After her birthday, she had a simple request. She wanted an email account. Simple my butt! Having my kids on the internet already scares the crap outta me, especially if YouTube pops up!

If they’re on the computer, it’s right in front of me. The thought of her having an email account is mind blowing. She asked me a couple of times, but I just keep putting it off, for now.

I talked to some other moms and they said their kids are already texting. They text dozens of times a day, before and after school. My daughter may be the last non-texting tween. I’m perfectly fine with that. But I know it’s just a matter of time.

Of course, if she gets to start texting or emailing, Randall and I would have full access to everything she does. I’m so afraid we would miss something though. There are so many ways around your parents' watchful eyes and there are so many freaks out there.

It’s a big step and I just don’t know how to take it. But I better get on the ball because I certainly don’t want her to do it behind my back.

Lynda is the mom of three and co-host of Mix 101.5 WRAL-FM's The Mix Morning Show. Find her here on Thursdays. Click here to see her Facebook page.

6 Comments

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  • wildcats Jul 19, 2013

    Lynda, I enjoy reading your articles!!

  • sat123 Jul 18, 2013

    You can set Gmail up to copy you on every email she receives.

  • Killian Jul 18, 2013

    I think there are two really big points that could alleviate our concerns here:
    1. You are the parent; no discussion. So if you allow the email account, have a zero tolerance policy for violating your rules. For example: you have her password and she is NOT allowed to change it. She cannot give her email address to anyone you have not approved. She cannot reply to any email from someone you haven't approved unless you read it first and then give approval. She is not to delete ANY email message without your OK. Restrictive? Yup. And it needs to be at that age. As she gets older and earns trust, you loosen the reigns as you see fit.
    2. Listen to her. Understand that there are valid reasons for having email accounts - for example, many schools have systems where the kids and teachers exchange emails, send/receive messages about homework or projects, etc. If she -ever- tells you that someone is harassing her, intervene. Change her email address, etc.
    3. Breathe. You're raising a good kid.

  • bjgupton Jul 18, 2013

    let her have one at 10, cause it will get harder to check up on her as she gets older.

  • mommyof4 Jul 18, 2013

    There are alot of freaks out there and Kids aren't the only ones that have to be careful. You just emplied, on a Very Public blog, that you may soon be letting your child stay home by herself. I know you would like to think that only soccer moms read your blogs, but you can never be sure. I don't mean for this to come across as scolding, just a reminder to us all how easy it is to be taken advantage of on the Internet.

  • mlt0923 Jul 17, 2013

    hey lynda :) not sure if you're interested or not, but you could check out www.kidsemail.org. you can try the service for free for the first 30 days without having to enter a credit card number. good luck! i enjoy reading all your posts :)