Go Ask Mom

Go Ask Mom

Guest mom: On faith and parenting

Posted June 22, 2010

When I was pregnant with my son, I prayed a lot. I read my Bible and my daily devotional and thought about the kind of mother I wanted to be: The kind of mother that I have. Faithful, honest, real, giving.

I was extremely fortunate to have been raised by such a woman and I wanted to be just like her. I was anxious in a world of unknowns that lasted for me, 39 weeks. And during that time, I needed my faith. I needed to know that even though I didn't have a measure of control over this life inside me, someone somewhere did. My faith in God was my guidepost through those months even when I didn't realize it. And then as a new mother, basking in the afterglow of my newborn son, I was overcome with love for my family, my husband and our child, and felt a renewed devotion and love for my Creator.

And then reality set in.

I sooo wanted to be that woman. You know her, I'm sure: That perfect faithful woman who is patient, kind and slow to anger. A woman projecting the picture of love as written in 1 Corinthians 13. And in my mind, this storybook fantasy mom persona was attainable. That is, of course until I actually became a mom and I realized that I am not perfect, nor could I ever hope to be. Some days that notion is freeing, while on many others it feels like a half-ton brick weighing me down. All this work. All this hard work will never amount to perfection!

How discouraging!

And that is where faith comes in. I need a daily check-in to remind myself that each and every non-perfect task in my daily routine is important. My household is my workplace for now, and I have the job of forming the earliest memories of my son's life. I realized that not even the Proverbs 31 woman was perfect. She did her part, and she did her best. That is what I want to do. And that is what I want to teach my children. That faith in God isn't about perfection. It never was. It's about trusting Him to fill in the gaps of my heart, not my actions.

Motherhood has changed me as a person, but in terms of faith, it has revolutionized the way I see the world and myself in it. Sometimes I still struggle with wanting that perfect mom image. And I just have to take a deep breath and remember that perfection isn't what I remember when I think of my childhood. I remember a mother who was and still is faithful, honest, real and giving. Those are the qualities I am striving for as a mother. My journey of faith in God is a constant reminder to stay true to those values.

And that, I think, is just perfect.

Andrea, a Raleigh mom, is always looking for new sources of encouragement. She can be found at her blog Lil-Kid-Things, on Facebook or on Twitter.


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  • sgbasham Jun 24, 2010

    Andrea, if you've never been to a MOPS (Mothers of PreSchoolers) group, you really need to find one! MOPS is an international Christian organization that has something for every mom, no matter where she is in her spiritual journey.

  • luke Jun 24, 2010

    You NAILED it!!Great article.Looking forward to more musings from Andrea Updyke

  • atcain2 Jun 23, 2010

    Love it! That is such a great reminder. Thank you. I also enjoying reading the blogs at They have are great for women all of ages, but especially with children.

  • heidipetterson Jun 23, 2010

    Thanks for the encouraging word. Being a mom is hard but being able to draw strength from God is a gift. It has also made my relationship with Him stronger as I teach my little one about Him and His love and discipline (one of the harder lessons). Around Easter it was a special gift to teach him about why we celebrate that time and how excited he was to learn about it. At 3 I do not know how much he understands but I am thankful to know that God's word does not fall on deaf ears either. Be encouraged in this everyday, moms!

  • Glass Half Full Jun 23, 2010

    Wonderful post, well thought out and well written. A great pattern for parenting and a very enlightening viewpoint. Love it! Thanks!

  • VivaceConBrio Jun 23, 2010

    I have a 6 year old and a 4 month old. My husband walked out the door when our baby was a few days old. I needed this today. Thank you

  • Piety Jun 23, 2010

    Well said. Calling on the name of Jesus gets me through too. There is power in his name!

  • bgb Jun 23, 2010

    Being a mom is the most wonderful feeling.I know your Mom is proud of the post also.I remember my Mom telling me certain things when I was little.She had a strong faith in God.She gave me so much wisdom and it has stayed with me.Now it comes out of my mouth when I am talking to my son who will soon be a teenager.It sounds just like her talking.

  • jrhammlett Jun 23, 2010

    I bet your mom is super proud of this post. And I couldn't agree more with this post. Becoming a mom has changed all of my relationships, even my relationship with God. Of course, these changes are all positive even if I don't immediately see them that way.

  • wral19 Jun 22, 2010

    Motherhood or fatherhood changes all of us and revolutionizes the ways we think about the world - it really makes you throw out a lot of the inconsistencies and shortcuts in your belief system. For my wife and me it totally reaffirmed and reinforced our atheism. It's not just that it gets you closer to, or further from a god, it (parenthood) makes it clear that you've got to commit to your feelings if you're going to be any kind of positive example for your child.

    -An atheist of high morals (as most atheists are)