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Lynda Loveland: Looking for chaos?

Posted July 18, 2012

Lynda Loveland

A few months back, I felt like I was on the brink of spinning out of control. Like when you hit some water driving down the highway. You feel the car start to hydroplane and you know if you make one wrong move you’ll be on the side of the road wheels up.

I have a full-time job, three young, very active kids, a husband, two dogs (now) and four guinea pigs. Into that mix I throw in: Exercise, gardening, keeping the house fairly clean and fairly clutter-free, a good dinner every night, kids soccer, kids karate, volunteering, kids appointments, errands and occasionally when the planets align, me time.

I’m off and running from 3:40 a.m. till 9:30 p.m., or so. This isn’t a “woe is me” story, and I know people have it worse. I’m just setting you up for my point.

I was making myself so busy, while I was doing one thing, I was already thinking about the next thing I needed to do! I was never “in the moment” and I was becoming anxious. Gotta get it done. Always in a rush. I wasn’t enjoying anything. Everything was a blur.

I told myself one day, this has to stop. I can’t continue like this and be a good mom, a good wife and a good me. I took a hard look at what I do in a day. Do I really need to do this? Do I really need to do this today? Do I really need to volunteer that much?

I started getting my kids to do more around the house. I added in some me time. (It took a time or two to get over the guilt. Crazy I know.) Lynda's new puppy Pippa

And one thing that really helped, I started pausing. I paused before I switched to a new activity, whether it was at home or out and about. If I was running errands, I’d sit in the car between stops for a couple of seconds and take some deep breaths. It calmed me and slowed me down.

I really felt like I was getting control back. I felt good.

So just when I had everything under control and I’m trying to do less, what do I do? I get a puppy! An Old English Sheepdog.

And you know what’s even crazier? We’re actually thinking about adopting her brother too! Yeah, not one, but TWO pups! Maybe it’s just me, but it’s as though I’m looking for more chaos now that I have everything “fixed!" You know, something else to work on.

I’ve cut back only to add more! What the heck is wrong with me???

Lynda is the mom of three and co-host of Mix 101.15 WRAL-FM's Bill & Lynda in the Morning. Find her here on Thursdays. Click here for her Facebook page.


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  • pirategirl12 Jul 21, 2012

    Congrats on the new "baby"!!

  • snowl Jul 20, 2012

    Cut back on your work hours and enjoy more family time instead of getting more animals....I'm not going to be the enabler on this one! Sorry...:)

  • carousel mom Jul 20, 2012

    Ha! I'm glad I'm not the only one that lives like this :)

    My three are now 10 & 7 (set of twins) and I don't know why I feel guilty about giving them chores. It's stuff I've done for years, so there's the part of me that doesn't want to let it go, and wants it done just right; but the other part reminds me to let them learn how to do it. But they are plenty old enough to have a few chores to help out.

    And it gives me a smidge of me time. Which I promptly fill up with something else.... But hey, I tried :)

  • iwannareply Jul 19, 2012

    I am relatively sure it is the thinness of the air you are breathing up there................

  • goforth4pack Jul 19, 2012

    Definitely adopt the brother! Awesome article!

  • NCishome Jul 19, 2012

    No quiet life changed when Mom came to live with us due to health reasons. We were a two dog family now we have three (Mom's dog) and this summer I have our extended family's 7yr old. I have full time job and do the normal house thing. So yeterday some kittens were found near by...yes, I went and loved one just a little. Would loved to give it a forever home. The 3 dogs and husband voted NO!!

  • UNCW_Ash Jul 19, 2012

    Two puppies always better than one-we adopted a brother/sister pair in December and they keep each other company, comfort one another and snuggle together at night in their crate. Dogs need a companion too-with your family's busy schedule you won't always be around...just like us!

  • lyndiaboswell2 Jul 19, 2012


  • mama2two Jul 19, 2012

    it must be a mom thing. as soon as we start to think we have things under control we go and screw it up... :) i say yes! get Pippa's brother!

  • whatever02 Jul 19, 2012

    You amaze me. I only have a full-time job, aging parents that I help care for, 3 dogs, a husband who cooks, a housekeeper who comes once a week and I still can't find time for me time. I can't imagine throwing children into the mix. Kudos to you and to all mothers who keep it together. I could not do it. I think the Lord was looking out for me when he did not put a bit of maternal yearning in me. Congrats on the new puppy (or puppies). She is beautiful.