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Fayette-Mom: Lordy, Lordy, Mommy's not 29

Posted May 7, 2012

Jennifer Joyner

If you run into my kids this week and they seem utterly pleased with themselves, it is not without cause. You see, in their world, not much trumps being able to tease their mother about something — and this has been a banner week.

They’ve had several days in which they could chorus, at the tops of their lungs, a song that most women dread hearing directed their way for most of their adult lives:

“Lordy, Lordy……Mommy’s……..not…..29” (ahem).

Please understand — vanity went out the window long ago, just around the time that I figured out I faced a daily choice: Grab 20 minutes of sleep while the baby is still dozing, or forgo the extra sleep in lieu of a shower.

Sleep’s been winning that race since 2004.

Oh, I kid. Now that both kids are in school most of the day, I do actually bathe with regularity. Even curl my hair and slap on some lip gloss, most of the time.

So no … I was not approaching my …. very special birthday ….. with any kind of hope of staving off Father Time. In fact, I am quite comfortable with where I find myself in the walk of life, thank you very much.

I just don’t see the need to broadcast it for the whole neighborhood to enjoy. I would have much preferred to let it pass as any other day, at least to the outside world.

No, dear husband, I don’t want 40 pink flamingos to dot the lawn.

Thanks girlfriends, but no black balloons necessary.

Really, can we just move along here, people????

Yes, we could …. except, that is, for my children.

How at the ages of 8 and 6 do they know how much their song makes me … squirm?

Especially when I’ve been so stoic about it!


After the third day, I stopped fighting it. Sing all you want kids ---- let the whole world know.

That’s right … your dear old mom is ……

… not a day over 31.

Jennifer is a mom of two and WRAL-TV assignment editor in Fayetteville. Her food obsession memoir, “Designated Fat Girl,” came out in 2010. Read more about Jennifer and her book on her website. Find her here on Go Ask Mom on Tuesdays.


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  • dianebearden May 8, 2012

    Happy Birthday Jennifer. Today is my birthday and I am 61 although if you talk to my oldest son I am 71. He adds 10 yrs every year. Thats okay in two years he will be 40. I will get him. Again Happy Birthday to you.

  • PaintedTaz May 8, 2012

    I have to agree, 40 doesn't loom ahead of me (though it's coming sooner rather than later) as a horrible event. I'm more scared of 60 but by the time I'm 40, 60 will probably seem the same way. Be healthy and happy and age is just a number! :)

  • snowl May 8, 2012

    imo, someone (like your husband?) put that taunting verse into your kids mind...:) I don't ever remember my kids really taking notice of "my age"...haha. And I never tell strangers, because they always guess about 10 years younger than I truly am! HBD!

  • kellypratz May 8, 2012

    Believe me 40 is the new 20. Don't fret turning 40, didn't seem to bother me so much when I turned 40. This past April I turned 44 and I still don't feel like I'm in my 40's. Taking care of myself has helped as people that I know are shocked I'm in my 40's. Just embrace it. My kids think I'm cool too.