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chuck norris facts

Published Jul. 18, 2008

I know I just put up a blog, but this is so hilarious that I had to share...from www.chucknorrisfacts.com

  • Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.

  • There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

  • Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

  • The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.

  • There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.

  • Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill. 

     
  • The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.
  • Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face.
  • If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
  • Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
  • Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship
  • Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.


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    24 Comments


    Golo

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    Chuck Norris can win a game of connect 4 in 3 moves.

    Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.

    Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
    Click to view my profile Jake Wildstar
    GOLO member since July 4, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:30 p.m.
     Report abuse
    I have to stop coming back to this blog. LMAO !!
    Click to view my profile lbroyal
    GOLO member since October 2, 2007
    July 18, 2008 2:20 p.m.
     Report abuse
    lol funny stuff...
    Click to view my profile iluvwilmy
    GOLO member since April 24, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:19 p.m.
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    THERE ARE NO WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION IN IRAQ!!! Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
    Click to view my profile Jake Wildstar
    GOLO member since July 4, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:17 p.m.
     Report abuse
    The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
    Click to view my profile Jake Wildstar
    GOLO member since July 4, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:15 p.m.
     Report abuse
    ENERGY PROBLEM SOLVED, If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Austrailia for 44 minutes!
    Click to view my profile Jake Wildstar
    GOLO member since July 4, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:12 p.m.
     Report abuse
    Chuck Norris invented ground beef by throwing cows through chain link fences.
    st8kdryver
    July 18, 2008 2:11 p.m.
     Report abuse
    My son and I love watching "Walker, Texas Ranger."
    Historians_13th
    GOLO member since March 14, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:10 p.m.
     Report abuse
    Ms T a roundhouse kick is the most deadly thing in the universe if delivered by Chuck Norris,..............It's a type of Karate kick.
    Click to view my profile Jake Wildstar
    GOLO member since July 4, 2008
    July 18, 2008 2:09 p.m.
     Report abuse
    This is GREAT ! What is a roadhouse kick?
    Click to view my profile Ms T
    GOLO member since September 11, 2007
    July 18, 2008 2:05 p.m.
     Report abuse
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