brooklyn: blog bklynncmom's blog
just be glad you're not married to him!
Published Jan. 23, 2008This is why Suzy should not take Mike shopping against
his will.
After Mike retired, Suzy insisted Mike
accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
Unfortunately, Mike was like most men---he found
shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunately, Suzy was like most
women---she loved to browse.
One day Suzy received the following letter from
her local Wal-Mart:
Dear Mrs. Leonardos,
Over the past six months, your husband has been
causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot
tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both
of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband are listed below and are documented by our video
surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly
put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to
go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor
leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in
an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it
right away.'
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to
put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign
to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping
department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in
if they would bring pillows and blankets from the
bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could
help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you
people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera
and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting
department, he asked the clerk where the
antidepressants were.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously
while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced
his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels
(on the upper part of his chest, of course).
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when
people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the
loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least...
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the
door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey!
There's no toilet paper in here!'
Regards,
Wal-Mart
10 Comments
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rofl sounds like something my husband would do
January 23, 2008 5:04 p.m.
GOLO member since July 5, 2007
January 23, 2008 4:47 p.m.
GOLO member since August 23, 2007
January 23, 2008 4:46 p.m.
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January 23, 2008 4:44 p.m.
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January 23, 2008 4:42 p.m.
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January 23, 2008 4:36 p.m.
GOLO member since July 5, 2007
January 23, 2008 4:36 p.m.
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January 23, 2008 4:32 p.m.
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January 23, 2008 4:25 p.m.
January 23, 2008 4:17 p.m.
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