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raleigh free press
i’m a fair virgin
Published Oct 18, 2007Views: 81
Well, sort of. I actually tan quite well and I’m a happily married man. But, I’ve never been to the State Fair, and quite frankly I’m a little hesitant to start.
Besides my fear of Carnies and the fact that I don’t like cabbage, I’m a creature of comfort and hesitant to break my unimpressive streak. Maybe I’m afraid of finding myself stuck in a horde of red-eyed fair-goers in need of a deep fried fix, or maybe I just can’t bring myself to shell out hard earned cash when it could go to something far more practical, like, say, the Education Lottery. Now, I’d buy that for a dollar.
You see, when I think of the fair I envision some guy named Earl with just enough “smarts” to be dangerous, building amusement rides after a roll in the hay with the yak lady and as many teeth as he has completed years of a high school education. Think, the Waffle House plus NASCAR, divided by the horsepower of the General Lee.
I wouldn’t be surprised if my fears where unfounded and the Fair was actually a magical place where kid’s imaginations can run wild and parents can, if only for a day, travel back to a time when things were much simpler. A time when bad-knees didn’t mean arthroscopic surgery, but that you recently fell down and got an ouchie, and mortgages where but a glimmer in the eyes of their ceramic piggy banks.
So, as this week quickly approaches its end, I’m faced again with my annual decision – to attend, or not to attend. That is the question. Whether ‘tis nobler to sample the turkey leg or to remain a groundling, looking on from amongst the crowd. Well, “If cowards die many times before their death,” perhaps this is the year for me…
Filed under: Personal
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