Academy Awards fashion round-up

Meryl Streep - She looks like she borrowed this outfit from MC Hammer. 

Angelina Jolie - She is on this list because of the giant slit up the side of her dress. While she thought she was being sexy, all I saw was a skinny little bone leg that made me worry if she was eating.  I thought I had accidentally flipped over to "The Walking Dead" when I saw a closeup of her during the show. She was looking pale and frail and, frankly, I am worried. 

Sandra Bullock - What was this? You always look so nice. Did you just decide to phone it in for once?! The top of the dress is what really bothers me. It looks over-sized and the patterns in the middle...is that a seaweed design?

Ellie Kemper - She makes this list only because her bangs were trying to eat her face. The dress was fab. 

Michelle Williams - I love you, Michelle. I root for you. But I am not feeling this dress. I am never a fan of a dress that makes you look bigger around your hips. I can't stand the new trend on the red carpet - the peplum. It is a great idea because you can use it to sneak your small dog or bag of Cheetos into the ceremony under it, but it isn't attractive to me. 

Melissa McCarthy - The color, the cut, the belt around the waist - everything with this dress worked! 

Viola Davis - Love this color! She looked amazing!

Milla Jovovich - I have no idea why the star of the "Resident Evil" films was even at the Academy Awards, but she looked great! Beautiful dress, perfect hair.