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Are you guilty of self-sabotage?

Posted September 25

Some things we do are bad for us. They may not seem bad, and we may not even know we are doing them. But these seemingly innocent things can bring us down, make us feel sad or angry or sabotage our lives. If you find yourself guilty of any of the following, it may be time to make a change.

Comparing yourself with others

This is one of those things you may not realize you are doing. Simple things like scrolling through social media or reading a magazine can show you how people you know, and even people you don’t know, are living. Their lives look perfect as you scroll through their Facebook feed. You may feel upset or angry that your life is not that way. You don’t have a perfect job or home, and you fight with your spouse every other day. You may wish your situation was different. Don’t do this.

It is easy to make your life seem perfect on social media, but the reality is, nobody’s life is perfect. Everyone has their ups and downs, problems and triumphs. If you find it bothering you too much, disconnect from social media or make a list of things you are grateful for in your own life. Try focusing on what you have, not what you don’t have.

Buying things on credit

It seems everything is bought with credit these days. Cars, houses, education, clothes, electronics. Every store has their own credit card and it is not that hard to get one. Be careful. When you buy too many things on credit, you may find yourself in a hole you cannot get out of. This is one of the most dangerous forms of self-sabotage. Debt can rack up pretty fast, and it may take a lifetime to pay off.

If you are already in a lot of debt, don’t despair. But also don’t continue to get further into debt. Start small. Pay off your smallest debt first, then go up from there. If you find yourself in a financial situation where the only option is using credit, know that everyone has hard times. It is understandable, but make sure you have a plan in place. Perhaps you are in school or looking for a new job that will bring you a career and more income. Make it your priority to pay off your debts before buying a house or new car.

Settling

Do you find yourself just going with the flow? Have you worked at the same dead end job for years now? Have you forgotten what your childhood dream was? Or your dreams for you life when you started college? You might be settling.

Settling is safe and comfortable, but you only have one life to life. Will you be happy knowing that instead of shooting for the stars, you only aimed high enough to sustain your life? Go for it. Step outside your comfort zone and don’t let fear stop you from achieving something great.

Spending too much time doing things that don’t matter

Everyone is given 24 hours a day, but it seems some people get way more done than others. How are they so successful at managing their time? Most likely they are not wasting time. You, on the other hand, may be guilty of spending too much time on things that just don’t matter.

For example, you may sit down to watch an episode of your favorite show and realize you’ve watched four hours of episodes before you know it, leaving your to-do list undone. Watching TV or movies, spending time on the internet, playing video games, even leisure activities like reading or sleeping can take up way more of our time than we realize. When possible, schedule your day and stick to it. Schedule in some down time, but make sure you don’t go over your allotted time. You will be amazed at how much more time you have in the day.

Not taking care of yourself physically or mentally

A simple, yet profound way you may sabotaging yourself is by neglecting yourself. Your physical and mental health require regular exercise and nutritious food. If you are not eating healthy, exercising, getting regular check-ups, taking time to relax and recharge and helping our minds to stay sharp, you are putting yourself at risk of health problems. You can’t live in fear that you will contract an illness if you don’t work out every day, but you need to be aware of what keeps your body healthy.

These are simple things that you may not even realize you're doing but can be extremely damaging to your health, budget and overall well-being. It's OK to binge watch your favorite show, but don’t do it every day. Be aware of how you spend your time and you’ll find yourself being more productive, healthy and even happier.

Megan Shauri graduated with a bachelors in Anthropology and a masters in Psychology. She lives in Orange County, CA and is a mother of twins. Contact her at Meganshauri@gmail.com

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