Amanda Lamb: Grief isn't for sissies

This year, instead of our usual trek to my husband’s stepmother’s house Down East, we spent the holiday with my mother’s family outside Charlotte. They had graciously invited us soon after my mother’s death.

In attendance were my cousins, their children and spouses, and uncle. I knew in advance that this decision would make for a more emotional holiday, but I felt like it was important to connect with people who would connect me as closely as possible to my mother.

My cousin and her husband prepared a lovely meal in a comfortable, relaxed atmosphere. We were joined by her son, her brother, his wife, their children and my uncle. We visited, we laughed, told stories, and while I was reminded of my mother at almost every turn, I was somehow able to smile through the tears as memories of past holidays with her came flooding back.

I know intellectually that this is just the first of many holidays in the future that I will spend without my mother. The good news is that I survived this first one without melting into an emotional wreck.

Those of you who have been through it will know what I mean when I say grief isn’t for sissies, and I’m no sissy.