8 compliments you don't realize are hurting your husband

Posted September 7

You think you’re sweet talking, but you’re actually causing damage. (Deseret Photo)

One of the best ways to show your husband that you love him is with your words. You tell him you love him, need him, respect him, etc. and assume that this strategy is a great way to convey your love.

Although this is a fantastic idea, be careful what you say. Even compliments that sound great like, “When you do that it reminds me of my dad.” You love your father, but he doesn’t necessarily enjoy being compared to him.

Not sure what compliments he may not love as much as you think he does? Here are 8 compliments that if you think about it carefully can be taken the wrong way.

1. “Wow, I’m shocked at how well you did that.”

The way that this is phrased makes it seem like you expected him to fail. Did you? He wants you to be proud of him, not shocked by his successes.

2. “You’re so cute.”

Men want to feel like the masculine man, not a cute little puppy. Cute implies that he is adorable, which to him is not the compliment he wants.

3. “Some days you amaze me.”

He can’t help but wonder what he does to you the other days. Just tell him “you amaze me” and avoid the connotations derived from ‘some days.’

4. “Thanks for trying.”

This sentence usually comes with a disappointing tone that doesn’t help the fact that he now feels inadequate.

5. “You’re just like another girlfriend.”

Ouch…. he is your man! What you are meaning to say is that you trust him like you do your girlfriends. Say that instead.

6. “I love you, but…”

By adding a ‘but’ to such a sweet compliment with ‘love’ in the sentence, it turns the compliment around. It then becomes a phrase he does not want to hear because it comes with a critique.

7. “You’re so romantic.”

Especially if your man wouldn’t consider himself to be super secure in himself, this phrase is not something he hopes to hear. Romantic gestures are a more feminine thing to men so calling him a romancer makes him feel feminine.

8. “You always look good.”

Even men complain about their body in the mirror. When you tell him he always looks good, although you are trying to tell him he is sexy all of the time, he thinks you are telling him that he is average.

Never in a million years would you have guessed that men could take these phrases so poorly, but they can. Make sure to study your husband’s expression when you say these things to see whether your husband likes the compliments you are trying to praise him with. Talking to him about it can also give him an opportunity to open up to you and be honest about the way he is feeling.

Tana is a student with a passion for words. She believes that written words can touch people in ways unimaginable. In her spare time she enjoys singing, hiking, cuddling in a fuzzy blanket, and spending time with her friends and family.


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