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6 ways you are unknowingly pushing your husband to divorce you

Posted May 1

In most cases, divorce is unpleasant. Sometimes divorce is necessary, but other times it can be avoided if both parties desire to save their marriage. In a study done by Pennsylvania State University, the top reasons men listed for divorce was incompatibility, infidelity, lack of communication and personality problems.

Many of these causes for divorce can be avoided if both men and women desire to improve themselves for the sake of their relationship. Husbands, you can find out ways you might be pushing your wife to divorce here, but wives, this article is for you. Here are six things you unknowingly do that push your husband away:

1. You let yourself fall apart

There are times where life chews you up and spits you out. Your husband understands that, but what drives him away, is when you spend an extended period (weeks at a time) looking like you just got out of bed. He appreciates the effort you put into your appearance. He loves when you occasionally dress up for him.

When you look and feel put together, he feels loved, respected and wanted.

2. You don't see him as a priority

Children, work and other responsibilities are important, but they might be getting in the way of your relationship. If your husband isn’t your number one priority, you will drift apart over time. It's especially difficult for him when you withhold affection. A quick kiss as you're running out the door isn’t the same as a romantic evening or an intimate night in the bedroom without any distractions.

Make him feel special and he will do the same for you. Your parenting will also improve when you're both on the same page.

3. You try to change him

You love you husband, or you should at least. Don’t try to make him change to fit your ideal life. Never compare your man to other men and avoid excessive nagging. This will make him feel unloved and unwanted.

Love your husband for his good traits and his bad traits. Love him for who he is, not who you wish he was.

4. You're a drama queen

Over-the-top emotions, talking non-stop and constant complaints will drive your husband insane. Insulting other women (and men) is a complete turn off for your husband. When you're always running your mouth and never listening to him, he will start to distance himself from you, which will eventually lead to divorce.

Take time to listen to your man and keep your emotions and cruel thoughts to yourself. Even better, stop gossiping all together.

5. You don't treat him as an equal

You are not his mom or his boss, so don’t act like them. When you ask for advice, listen and follow it (at least occasionally). Let him make decisions and admit when he is right about something (especially if you were so insistent that he was wrong). Let him protect and provide for you by asking for help and allowing him to get nice things for you. Avoid being controlling and bossy.

Relationships require teamwork, and though that doesn’t mean you will always agree on everything, it means you must respect and support each other.

6. You're too dependant, emotional and/or critical

If he is your only friend, things are probably not going to continue down a happy path. At the same time, if you are too emotional or critical about him, then he is going to feel like a failure and get frustrated with you. You need to stand on your own two feet, find independence and work with your man, not tear him down.

Don’t let jealousy or loneliness drive your husband away. Instead, work with your husband to build an interdependent marriage. Both you and your spouse will be much happier if you do so.

Small efforts lead to positive results. Protect your marriage by looking carefully at your behavior and talking to your husband about what you can improve. Relationships take compromise and diligence, and as long as both you and your man put in that work, you will strengthen your love for one another.

Stacie Simpson is a journalism student. She loves listening to, gathering and sharing stories and advice to help others improve their quality of life. She spends most of her free time with her husband, ballroom dancing, reading and writing.

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