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5 more signs he's not ready for a relationship

Posted March 20

You may be smitten with your new boo, but you should still be on the lookout for red flags.

Here are five more signs he’s not ready for a relationship:

1. He has a long list

Having a list of what he wants is okay, but having a long list detailing the ins and outs of every action, every thought and every inch of his ideal woman, is a bad sign. A long list signals inflexibility and control issues. If he has such a list, he isn't interested in being or growing with a real person whose personality and body is going to change in the future. He wants a cardboard cutout to fit perfectly into his world like a puzzle piece, and he has no room for compromise.

2. He’s a serial dater

Having countless relationships in the past isn’t necessarily bad, but if things are fizzling out only after a few weeks of seeing each other, there may be a few things to consider. He may choose to date people based purely on looks, he may be unable to commit to one person or he may not know how to keep a relationship going after the infatuation stage.

He may be someone who doesn’t know why his relationships don’t last, and if he can't see his faults, your relationship probably won't get off the ground.

3. He hasn’t learned from his past

Likewise, a man who continues to make the same relationship mistakes and doesn’t learn from his past is a bad bet in love. Everyone gains wisdom from every relationship, every break-up and every date. If he’s not learning from his experiences, you are both going to go in circles and never move to the next step.

4. He has no plans for the future

If he’s not in school, bettering himself or charting his career path, he’s not ready for a relationship. These people are called “floaters.” Floaters don’t build solid foundations in relationships or in life. With sheer luck and good decisions, things may end up okay for him, but you’ll never feel totally secure in life with this guy.

5. He needs you

He needs you to feel good about himself, to pay his bills, to fit in with his friends and much everything else in-between. A man who is ready for a relationship wants you, but he shouldn’t need you. He should be able to live a rich, full life with or without you. Being needed all hours of the day will inevitably make you feel smothered.

When it comes to your love life, be aware of these warnings. They may dishearten you if they come to light, but they’ll save you a lot of heartache in the end.

Georgia D. Lee is a University of Miami Alumna who seeks to empower, inspire, enrich and educate anyone with an open mind, heart and spirit through her most treasured medium - black and white!

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