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5 hidden reasons your hubby isn't happy

Posted 12:00 p.m. Thursday

Feel like you can’t do anything to please your partner? Here are 5 hidden reasons your husband is unhappy. (Deseret Photo)

If it feels like you can’t do anything to please your husband lately, there may be a lot going on underneath. He likely won’t let you know exactly what’s wrong. He also may not even know why he’s been down or irritable as of late. But a low phase doesn’t have to spell disaster for your marriage.

Here are 5 hidden reasons your husband might be unhappy:

1. He hates his job

With commute, training and overtime your husband spends a full 1/3 of his life working. If he doesn’t enjoy it, it can greatly affect the other 2/3 of his life, half of which is spent sleeping. So in reality if your husband hates his job, he hates a full 50% of his life. This would tear anyone down over time. It may not be an easy fix but helping to make the rest of his time enjoyable might perk him up enough to see a difference in his attitude.

2. He feels unsupported

Your significant other can get grouchy if he feels like you’re not on his side or not pulling your weight. If you frequently find yourself on opposing sides of an argument try seeing things from his perspective, even if you don’t outright agree. If he’s overwhelmed and stressed with work, pick up more of the tasks he usually handles at home for a little while. Let him know you notice his distress.

3. He doesn’t feel wanted

A man needs to feel wanted but doesn’t want to feel needed. Your husband may feel like you need him to survive in life but that you wouldn’t choose him if you had more options and less responsibility. This can drive a real wedge in between your relationship and make him doubt your union. Show more appreciation for him while exerting some independence.

4. He has no hobbies

Everyone needs a way to decompress from the pressures of work and family. If your partner doesn’t have a healthy way to escape everyday life all of that pressure can build up into a meltdown or an explosion. Help him soothe his stress by suggesting a hobby for him to take up. Anything from going to the movies by himself, biking, golf or recreational sports will help.

5. He feels unloved

Your husband is an emotional creature no matter how stoic he wants to seem. He needs to know you love him, and he wants your affection and attention. If the weight of the world has caused you to focus on other things, try to find the time and energy to make the love in your relationship a priority. Plan a special surprise, cook his favorite meal or plan a weekend getaway.

It can be hard to find out why your husband seems unhappy. He may not tell you anything is wrong. Or he may give you a surface level answer that hides his true feelings. But if you pay attention to his moods and notice what he finds fault in the most, you can tease out the true nature of his grievances and make amends.

Georgia D. Lee is a University of Miami Alumna who seeks to empower, inspire, enrich and educate anyone with an open mind, heart and spirit through her most treasured medium - black and white!

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