12 lies every mom tells her kids
Posted April 12, 2016
Some virtues you don't teach by example, and honesty is one of those. It's nothing to be ashamed about; all moms throw out a little white lie every now and then. It's what you have to do to avoid going insane. Here's a list of lies that every mother has told her kids:
1. I will leave without you
When your daughter is throwing her third tantrum at the store and holding on to an oversized stuffed animal for dear life, you may have thrown out an "I will leave without you." But even if you begin to walk in the other direction, you know it's one of the biggest lies you've ever told.
2. I would never eat your Halloween candy
Yeah, Halloween candy just disappears. Parents don't even like to eat candy. Especially mini Twix bars; moms never eat delicious caramely, chocolatey Twix bars that don't belong to them.
3. It's bedtime
But just because it's not the time the kids normally go to bed doesn't make it not time to go to bed tonight.
The perfect time to make a mess with finger paints or to eat a second ice cream cone will always be "later." It's the classic parent alternative to "no."
5. If you eat your broccoli, you'll grow big and tall
It definitely has to help out, regardless of the fact that genetics probably have more control over the big and tall factor than the nutrients in food.
6. We're almost there
And by "almost" we mean we're a quarter of the way to our destination.
7. Santa's watching you
Santa Claus is very real and he has a magic ball that shows when you do something wrong. Even if no one else ever finds out about it, Santa knows and he won't bring you that awesome double-barrel Nerf gun on Christmas.
8. I don't know
A more honest version would be "I don't know how to answer your question." Because frankly, some questions that kids ask are just better left unanswered for the time being.
9. I always know when you're lying
I mean, you at least almost always know when he's lying; that's pretty much the same as always knowing when he's lying.
10. The Tooth Fairy was on vacation last night
Yep; every fairy takes a spring break in Bermuda this time of year. Or, at least the fairies who visit the homes of parents who forget when their kid has lost another tooth take Spring breaks in Bermuda this time of year.
11. Your face will freeze that way
There's really no way of knowing whether this is true or not, so the next time your kids are making weird faces at passing cars and having an eye-crossing tournament, it's definitely your duty to warn them about their very possible fate.
12. I would never lie to you
Oh, you sneaky mom.
Melinda Fox has a Bachelor's in English and is a member of the FamilyShare content team.