100 ways to serve your spouse

Posted October 13

The other day I found my sweet husband standing on the kitchen counter washing the blinds. Like deep-cleaning the blinds. The dirty, dusty, I-haven't-cleaned-these-ever blinds. Yes, he is that amazing. He proceeded to go around and deep-clean all the blinds on the first floor of our home. Without complaining. And without mentioning his disgust at how dirty they have become!

He simply saw something that needed to be done and he did it.

His simple act of service made me think of all the little - and big - ways that he serves me. Since I just had a baby two weeks ago, this husband of mine has been serving me around the clock. Literally. He has been selfless, considerate and way too kind to me, and I don't know if there is room in my heart for all the love that keeps on growing for him in there (OK, there will always be room - my heart is just getting stretched in all the right ways!).

Watching my husband serve me has helped me feel loved, cared about and safe in our relationship. It has also made me want to find more ways to serve my husband!

It has taken me almost eight years of marriage, but I think I am finally discovering that service is one of the great secrets to a happy marriage. In fact, it is A CENTRAL AND NECESSARY KEY for a successful and well-nurtured marriage. I'm sure of it.

So, if you are looking for something you can do to improve your marriage immediately, find a way to make the life of your spouse a bit better, a bit easier, and a bit more joyful, here are 100 ideas to get you started. Although I'm sure you will find your own way to "deep-clean the blinds" for your spouse. Just trust me, simple acts of service are bound to improve your marriage relationship in big ways.

1. Move the laundry.

2. Cuddle up with him in the morning for a few extra minutes.

3. Bake your wife's favorite treat for her.

4. Take her car to get detailed.

5. Don't complain about anything for 24 hours.

6. Be available to talk.

7. Flirt with him and initiate intimacy.

8. When your wife comes in the door after going grocery shopping, jump up and carry in all the groceries for her.

9. If you notice that the carpet hasn't been vacuumed in awhile, vacuum it.

10. When your husband is sick, wait on him hand and foot.

11. Plan a surprise trip for the two of you.

12. Compliment her in front of your friends.

13. Write an encouraging note and leave it on his pillow.

14. Send her a thoughtful text.

15. Let him sleep in.

16. Be quick to forgive - every time.

17. Pick up that prescription for her.

18. Point out what he is good at and why you love that about him.

19. Sincerely ask what you can do to simplify her day.

20. Send your husband off to the driving range for a few hours on a Saturday, while you take care of things at home.

21. Make her take a night off to do something she wants to do.

22. Schedule that appointment for him.

23. Hold her hand in the car.

24. Mop the floor.

25. Plan a super fun date for the two of you - hit up the archery range, play laser tag, eat double-bacon cheeseburgers, you name it.

26. Always empty the dishwasher when it is clean, never leave it.

27. Work on changing something you do that consistently bugs your spouse.

28. Mow the lawn for him.

29. Hug your wife - tight - for at least three minutes.

30. Don't complain when she has to stay late at work.

31. Suggest that she pick the show for you two to watch.

32. Heart attack his car.

33. Run to Walgreens at midnight to pick up feminine items for her when that time of the month surprises her. ​

34. Thank him for his advice.

35. Turn on your song and start dancing.

36. Stay home from a guy's night out to just spend time with your wife.

​37. Ask, "Hey, what can I do for you?"

38. Buy her that piece of exercise equipment she has been wanting.

39. Help him check something off of his bucket list.

40. Find out what is stressful to him and find a way to help him out.

41. Give him a back rub.

42. Make her lunch for her every day before she leaves for work.

43. Take the night shift when the kids (or dog) wake up.

44. Say something kind to him when he walks in the door, like, "My favorite person just walked in the door."

45. Choose to be happy and positive.

46. Leave the last bit of milk for him so he has enough for his cereal in the morning.

​47. Wear her favorite cologne at home, because you know she loves it.

48. Buy tickets for a date night to his favorite concert without him knowing.

49. Whisper, "You are beautiful," in her ear.

50. Listen to him and don't interrupt.

51. Make his eggs in the morning, just the way he likes them.

52. Ask her to teach you how to do something she is good at. ​

53. Clean out the garage.

54. Thank him for something specific. ​

55. Give her a foot rub.

56. Rent his favorite movie and cuddle up with him to watch it.

57. Pick fresh flowers for her.

58. Smile every time she looks at you.

59. Be happy for him when he gets to do cool things for work.

60. Come home from work early for a surprise date night.

61. Find a babysitter so you can go on an overnight getaway. ​

62. Put toothpaste on her toothbrush.

63. Surprise him at work and take him out to lunch.

64. Fill up his car with gas.

65. Send him an email just to say, "Thanks." ​

66. Pay the bills without having to be reminded.

67. Help her with her physical therapy after surgery.

68. Cheer her on at her softball game.

69. Get ready well ahead of time so you will be on time for her big event (since you tend to be late).

70. Put a new roll of toilet paper on instead of leaving it empty.

71. Cook a romantic dinner for her and eat it by candlelight.

72. Change the baby's diaper.

73. Write a note on the mirror with dry erase markers.

74. Clean the toilets.

75. Workout together and motivate him with his running goals.

76. Turn off your game and ask her to go on a walk with you.

77. Put the kids to bed and draw a bath for her.

78. Encourage her when she is feeling nervous or doubtful.

79. Pay him a very sincere and very specific compliment.

80. Weed the back patch that always needs weeding.

81. Hold the door open for her.

82. Clean the hairs out of the shower that she "accidentally" left there.

83. Tell him that he looks like a hunk.

84. Take his car in for an oil change.

85. Ask her what you can do to help her accomplish her dreams.

86. Say, "You look really beautiful."

87. Tidy up his desk for him.

88. Turn on his favorite station when you are in the car together.

89. Encourage her to go have an evening out with her friends.

90. Cut his hair.

91. Pickup shaving cream for him when you notice he is out.

92. Buy her that bag she has been wanting.

93. Wink at her from across the room.

94. Talk positively about him in front of his buddies.

95. Make intimacy a higher priority.

96. Thank her for all that she does.

97. Attend his Dr.'s appointment with him.

98. Kiss her when you walk in the door.

99. Listen to his advice and follow it.

100. Say, "I love you," more often.

Aaron & April are the founders of Nurturing Marriage, a website dedicated to strengthening marriages. They enjoy playing football with their two little boys, watching sports, eating cereal late at night, and going out for frozen yogurt.


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